Monday, February 10, 2014

Flupocalypse

Okay, maybe the title is a little over-the-top, but I am nothing if not true to my dramatic roots.

I am not a shrinking violet, a wallflower or a weak-willed hydrangea (I may have made that last one up.) but this year's Cold N Flu Season (CNFS) is just breaking me down in the worst way. I may not have the strongest immune system but if I do manage to catch something from the myriad of doorknobs, bus poles, and Starbucks countertops I touch each day, my body has the decency to throw it off after about a day or so.

I almost look forward to them, these little mid-week midwinter staycations. I sniffle and cough my way through Let's Make a Deal, The Price is Right, and a couple of judge programs, take a nap, make some toast, and then I'm right as rain by bedtime.

Not so much this time.

What started as a "that's a funny tickle in my throat" on Thursday night had rendered me into a snorting, coughing, leaking mess by Friday morning. And yet, if I'd known how bad I'd be by Monday morning I probably would have gone in to work on Friday. The weekend gave me a bit of a reprieve, I was able to make it to my parents for their excuse to eat exclusively fried foods Super Bowl get together, I managed to croak out a few songs with our Rock Band, No Losers Allowed, but come Monday, I was worse than when I started. I was basically in The Stand, people. M-O-O-N, that spells "Why can't I breathe through my nostrils or my throat?"

I firmly believe in the necessity of sick days and I think people should take them if offered, if only to spare the others in the office from hearing your sick ass sputter its way through briefing sessions, but I personally feel guilty taking more than one in a row. But I really didn't have a choice this time around. Guilt was too strenuous a feeling to have. I had to settle for "general malaise", and even that amount of concern necessitated a 2-hour nap.

The dog was delighted, of course, because as soon as I was on the mend (aka: Thursday, when I had to go back to work so I could accompany a visitor on a programme I'd created), TB came down with whatever I'd had. This meant Lily was surrounded by at least one of her humans all of last week. And plenty of Kleenexes to eat. Whatever I can do to make you smile, hound.

I've finally come out of the haze, still sporting a smashing cough, but at least able to function in an upright position, which is just aces. This is the busiest time of the year at work, so I'm actually relieved to be back, if maybe a little frazzled from the time I spent off.

Basically, every element of this winter, from the temperature, to the sicknesses, to the snowfall, has just been balls. I know I'm stuck on repeat here, but I am just. Done. Let me lie in the snow and let the drifts rush over me, burying me until the hot dog carts are back out.